Everyone Except Hiccup
by Endevorer
Summary: Hiccup really wishes he knew why eating 'dragonfruit' turned everyone but him into a dragon. He also wants to know what he's supposed to when said dragons end up causing some serious mayhem.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: Dream Works and Cressida Cowell own the How to Train Your Dragon franchise.**

"ASTRID! NO! GET AWAY FROM ME!" was not something I was expecting to say today. Or ever.

My girlfriend nuzzled up to me, cooing and then LICKING THE ENTIRE LEFT SIDE OF MY BODY. Ugh. Why did she do that? Why? I wiped the saliva off my face.

I turned my head around and spotted Fishlegs eying Meatlug. I quickly broke off and had to go between both my oldest friend and his dragon.

Fishlegs looked back at me with a tilted head, Meatlug looking at her rider with a bit more trepidation.

But my troubles weren't ending. I quickly had to snatch away my bag from Snotlout who set the thing on fire. Can't say it's any different than usual. I groaned, putting the fire out. "Ugh, not again!"

And that was when the twins both of them tumbled their way through the entire group while fighting over a fish the size of a man. I had to step in and try wrestling the thing out of their grip, only for them to slip, causing the thing to swallow my head.

Toothless seemed to laugh at my expense. I eyed my dragon. "Very funny." I told him, while I took the thing off my head.

Okay, maybe by now you guys are wondering why the Hel I'm having such a hard time controlling my friends. I mean, sure, normally, it's Snotlout and the Twins causing havoc, but today was something special. REALLY special.

Oh, you haven't read between the lines. Okay, let me spell it out for you: my friends all turned into dragons! Don't believe me?

Astrid was a Nadder, mostly blue and some yellow. Bolder colors than Stormfly. She sat right by her friend, preening herself to make herself look more attractive...in her mind.

Fishlegs the green Gronkle was big, and green, and...well... a Gronkle. He was a bit bigger than Meatlug, who he was still trying to woo despite her obvious discomfort and confusion.

Snotlout the red Nightmare was a bit brighter red than Hookfang. He was a bit brawnier too, as if all of that muscle he was so proud translated to proportionately more buffness as a dragon.

Ruffnut and Tuffnut were both now fused into a Zippleback. I… don't know what pronoun to use for them anymore. I mean, how does this even work?  
...No I'm NOT looking down there!

Now you're probably wondering how it got this way.

It all started this morning, in a saner world….

"Wow, what're these?" questioned Fishlegs, looking down the lid of random barrel.

"Ah, those?" Trader Johann said. "Those are… Pity-ayas… or 'dragon-fruit' as they call them in the Orient. I'm not sure why, myself."

I picked a pinkish looking… bulb and casually tossed the thing in my hands. Seemed like a good value, I thought. They looked fresh too, not pickled either. "How much do these cost?"

The merchant did a thoughtful pose. "Well, I do still owe you from last time… I guess I can offer a barrel. I got more where that came from that I do!"

Okay. I thought that was a good deal. So I shook my hands with the merchant. I was thinking some exotic fruit from a far away land ought to have been a good snack for this trip I was planning. It was just going to be one of those days where we stayed away from town for the night, just us friends camping out under the stars on some deserted island. With our dragons.

Once we were at said island, I pulled out some fruits for everyone to enjoy (Dad had insisted I leave the majority behind).

"So what're these?" my girlfriend asked as she examined the fruit in her mitts.

"Trader Johann called them 'Dragonfruit'," I told her.

Astrid shrugged and took a bite.

"They don't look like dragons, Hey Ow!" Tuffnut earned a slap to the head from his sister.

Ruffnut caught the friend as it left his hand and took a bite. "Because they look like fruits, you idiot!"

Tuffnut grumbled something and then took one of his.

Fishlegs weighed the fruit in his hands and took a bite. "I wonder if these would be good when pulped." He then held the fruit over to Meatlug and offered it to her. "Want some?"

She sniffed it and gobbled the remainder of the fruit up.

I was about to eat one of the things myself, but then Toothless called out to me.

I put the fruit down and went over to my dragon. "What's wrong?"

Toothless let out a whine and then pointed at his mechanical fin. He'd broke it… again.

I sighed. "You gotta be more careful with it. We don't have that many parts to fix it."

My dragon whined.

I patted his belly and worked out some repairs here and there. He groaned contently, like an overgrown cat. Sometimes I wonder if he breaks things just to get my attention.

But before I could really work on my dragon's fin to a reasonable degree, I heard someone let out a hacking cough. I raised my head and saw my friends bending over and holding their stomachs, with looks of pain. "Uh, guys is something wrong?" They didn't reply.

Astrid fell to the ground, knees dug into the dirt.

I dropped what what I was doing and then went over to Astrid, Toothless behind me.

I heard the sound of fabric tear open and Astrid… Astrid _licked_ me.

I was sent back by a burst of her arms, just as they grew to humongous size and became wings. Within seconds, my girlfriend was a Nadder.

Looking to the others, I was startled as Fishlegs's... err, girth expanded rapidly as he turned green, knobby, and Gronkle-y. The twins fell on top of each other, inflating and meshing until you couldn't tell any part of them apart bar the heads. Snotlout just GREW, erupting into flame momentarily before falling to all fours, snarling as a Nightmare.

I just... stared. My friends had turned into dragons... more specifically, dragons like the ones they rode. It was… inexplicable now that I think about it. I mean what are odd that that would happen? Was it random what they turned into? Or maybe it was based on their dragons. I don't know… maybe if I ended up changing along with them, I might have been a Night Fury. I wasn't thinking about any of that though when they all celebrated their new forms by making a mess.

Which leads us back to where we are right now, me, the only human in a group of dragons. My friends' clothes were scattered all over the place, torn and in tatters, their bodies far too large to need them.

Astrid is… trying to flirt with me I guess. That was weird; I liked more attention from my girlfriend, but that was now how I wanted it. I really hope Fishlegs and Meatlug weren't getting too close, not the sort of thing I want to tell him when he changes back… if ever. It was kind of weird to think the only ones acting like themselves at all were the twins and Snotlout...

"Guys!" I called out.

My friends responded by giving me a brief look… before quickly turning their gazes back at whatever chaos they wanted to instill. I really don't know what happened to my friends; it was like they… were actually dragons now.  
And not the trained variety.

Toothless approached me with a gleeful look in his eyes over to the pinkish fruit I left behind. He nudged it a few times.

"No." I said flatly. My friends were all dragons and I don't think they were all that bright right now. Someone has to watch them, make sure they stay out of trouble. Ugh, when Trader Johann said that these things were called "dragonfruit" are they really supposed to turn people into dragons?

Toothless whined again. He really wanted me to try the thing. He was probably looking at how much "fun" the other dragons were having and was hoping I could end up joining him.

"... Maybe another time," I told him. Hopefully he'd understand. I mean, maybe it might be fun, assuming I could turn back. I mean, most people don't get that kind of experience, I think. And maybe I could try out flying or something… Although, I get the feeling that if I ever bring up this story back at home, as a prank, everyone I know would turn me into a Night Fury just to see what happens.

And that was IGNORING how my friends were acting right now.

I had to break up the pair of Gronckles yet again. Fishlegs and Meatlug in particular worried me. Now, I know it's nowhere near mating season, but I am kind of afraid of what might happen if I left the two of them alone. Hopefully, I was just worrying about things too much.

I suddenly found some force lift me off the ground, raising me by my jacket, whilst a second force tugged at my trousers. "Woah!" I quickly decided to abandon my jacket in favor of my pants; dragons or no, I was not going to let my friends see me like that.

I fell out my jacket, landing face first into the dirt. I spat out some dirt, regretting that I was actually able to think about my situation. I turned over to the one… well, duo responsible for my most recent bout of suffering. "Give me that back!" I raised a clenched fist over to Ruffnut and Tuffnut, who proudly grinned at their prize. Or maybe it was Barf and Belch? I can't tell anymore.

The other zippleback nearby responded by letting out a mad chuckle, in approval. He… it… uh, they ran off, prompting the one that stole my tunic to follow them.

I picked myself up and dusted myself, cursing whatever god was responsible for this madness.

Toothless looked at me with a happy smile.

"Thanks for letting them go," I gave him quip.

Toothless's smile did not break. Yeah, totally did this just to have me spend more time with him!

I then nearly ended up getting knocked onto the ground again, by a large tail that could have flattened me. Snotlout, as always, was attempting to coerce Astrid into doing something with him, tongue drooping out of his mouth like an eager dog, tail shaking everywhere.

Astrid replied by unfurling her spiked tail and wings in an aggressive posture. Snotlout understandably backed away after that.

Hookfang and Stormfly looked at the duo with an almost bored expressions. To be fair, they did kind of see this happening a mile away. Why was it that my friends' dragons acted more human than they did right now?

Astrid, once Snotlout was running away with his tail between his legs…literally, turned her attention over to me.

I gulped and then I decided I wanted to make myself scarce right about now. I dashed over and hid behind Toothless, hoping my dragon's enormous girth would protect me. He looked at me with a curious expression.

Astrid approached my dragon and then went over to his left. I moved to keep my dragon between me and my girlfriend. Odin, have times changed… I can't believe I found myself in a situation where I would want to stay away from Astrid! Astrid kept coming, turning around my dragon in an attempt to "find" me. She then quickly turned the other way, giving me only a second to correct myself before she could flush me out. I kept hidden, playing cat and mouse with my own girlfriend. In any other context, this might have been romantic.

Toothless must have been looking at us both and decided we were both being fools, or at least I was. He then got up, and moved away from me and my Nadder of a girlfriend, blowing whatever cover I had.

Astrid let out a happy cry and then tackled me to the ground, sending me a flurry of licks once I was pinned safely under her "caring" feet.

"You traitor…" I told my dragon, looking into his eyes.

Toothless shone me his teeth in an expression that told me he knew exactly what he was doing… I wish I did.

Astrid let her hold on the rest of my body slip…. but that was just because she wanted to grab me by my fake leg and drag me off somewhere. Probably somewhere more private.

I didn't bother fighting… this time. I kind of learned early on that if Astrid wanted me to do something… I go along with it. I'm betting that as a Nadder, that same rule probably applied.

Oh Odin, this is not how I wanted to spend my afternoon...

 **End: For those who do not know "Dragonfruit" actually exists. But it obviously does not turn you into a dragon. At least, I don't remember if it does.**

 **Ket: It doesn't.**

 **End: Maybe not the common garden variety…**

 **Ket: *evil grin***

 **End: In any case, for those who don't know. Most HtTYD stories that involve people turning into dragons often go with Hiccup first and always into a Night Fury… for reasons. This is one of the few times where… everyone else does it first.**

 **Ket: And no, they aren't entirely... human in mind anymore.  
ACK you lot probably don't know me. Right, well-**

 **End: Let's not get ahead of ourselves. We don't want to make this note bigger than the whole story.**


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: Dreamworks and Cressida Cowell own the How to Train Your Dragon franchise.**

"Astriiiid, what are you doing?" I asked plaintively as the Nadder dragged me away by my peg leg. I can't say she hasn't done this before. Just...never like THIS.

She cooed a bit, dragging me over to a large bush.

She stopped dragging me forward once we were in its shade. I gave my… still-girlfriend an awkward look as she bent her head down over to my face. She looked at me with a… well, she licked me.  
Again.

"Uh, Astrid…?" I said nervously. I didn't even wipe her spit off me… gah.

The Nadder's tail twitched back and forth in a rapid fashion. She then darted off out of the brush, leaving me to wonder about my fate. Strangely… that was actually kind of boring.

You guys are probably wondering why I am not freaking out at this point. I mean, my friends turning into dragons probably should have at least made me question what gods did this (Probably Loki, but I am not pointing fingers). Well, truth be told… I don't know. I just have this very strange feeling that it's all refreshing change of pace, like it's not every day that the others end up turning into dragons… Well, it's not every day that _anyone_ turns into a dragon, but you get my point!

I guess I should also be worried about my friends kind of losing their minds, sort of. It's like… they don't even have self restraint anymore.

I shook my head. Astrid still hadn't returned yet. I had to wonder if something happened to her…well, more than turning into a dragon that is.

I lifted myself off the ground and then went to go exit the shrubbery.

But then I suddenly found myself face to face with a large yellow eye, causing me to jerk back in surprise. It took me a second to realize who it was. "Stormfly?"

The natural Nadder's gaze turned towards me. I had her attention.

"You happen to know anything about this?" Maybe I was losing my mind…I was talking to a dragon. Okay, no, I do certainly have a brain!

She tilted her head, confused. No idea either.

"Thought so." Strange how it was the natural dragons seemed to understand me so well.

I went to go back to the others when Astrid whined. "Oh, what now..."

She began coughing, and hacking, and…  
"Eeeewwwww..."

A fish head had landed in my lap, oozing all sorts of...gunk and guts.

I looked Astrid with some very thinly suppressed disgust. She looked at me with that excited look again and I had a very, very bad idea of what she wanted.

"...I'm not eating that Astrid." I still have bowel problems from the last time she gave me food.

Astrid of course didn't seem to notice me.

Stormfly did and was casually trying to nudge her friend and Rider away.

The sad part was that this wasn't the first time I had this situation before. Well, minus having my girlfriend being a dragon.

I sighed and decided to swallow my pride… and something else along with it. Just remember… I did this before, with Toothless. I took the disgusting fish and put it in my mouth.

Astrid looked at me with uneasy apprhension and let out excited squeals as I slowly swalloed the thing.

...The Yaknog was worse. FAR worse. But don't tell her that!

I gulped the fish down my gullet and really had to wonder if I should consider changing my lifestyle since I keep having to eat things that leave me worse for wear.

Astrid seemed very pleased and then prompted to share some… words I think with Stormfly. The natural-born Nadder looked kind of bored by that. She didn't like her Rider's new… attitude.

Their "discussion" must've hit a sour point, as soon both were growling and assuming aggressive poses...  
Time for me to vacate the area.

I left before things went up in smoke. Oh Odin, I can't believe I am so glad to be away from my girlfriend...

With Astrid and Stormfly distracting each other, I quickly found myself looking face to face with a certain Night Fury. "You were a _big_ help back there!" I told him.

Toothless chortled. Again, my dragon is out to mess with me. Did I forget to feed him his favorite food again?

Did he want me to eat THAT still?

...And what was that smell?

Whipping my head towards the source, I saw a blazing Snotlout staring down at Hookfang. I guess after getting turned down by Astrid yet again, he wanted to go give himself a morale boost. and that meant trying to get Hookfang to listen to him…

Snotlout snarled angrily at the other Nightmare, taunting him to go forward. He snapped the air with his jaws and stomped onto the ground hard enough to shake the ground. He then blasted the area with a blaze, sending ash flying up in the air. His roar could probably be heard for miles and above open ocean!

Hookfang yawned and kept his head to the ground.

Snotlout snorted, huffing smoke and fire into the air. He was upset, angry, furious.

Hookfang rolled over onto his side.

Snotlout tackled the dragon tried to roll him off, just as he always did when Hookfang. Only this time, Snotlout was big enough to make such a deed plausible...

Within seconds, Hookfang was pinned under his ex-Rider. Well, somewhat pinned.

Snotlout howled in triumph, seemingly glad over "dominating" the opposition. He burned, battering ash all over the place as if it were… confetti.

Hookfang just snorted, annoyed with his Rider. The others just looked at Snotlout dumbly, as if waiting for him to do something else.

Snotlout seemed like he wanted to chastise his dragon, bending his head downward to deliver a speech, probably one of those things about how the dragon should be more active… but Hookfang fell asleep. This obviously upset the former teen, but Hookfang wasn't waking up no matter how hard he thrashed.

I did say "try".

I sighed, and decided to try and get Snotlout off his dragon...Somehow.

Before things got ugly.

I approached, hands up and alerted Snotlout to my presence. His response was to turn to me and growl, approaching me...

"Uh, nice dragon!" I gave him a wry grin. Okay… I'll admit that I wasn't expecting this. I mean… Snotlout clearly knows who I am… Oh, right. That's precisely the problem isn't it? He probably blames me for Astrid not well… you know. And where was my Night Fury! Toothless really seemed out to get me didn't he?

Unfortunately for Snotlout, he didn't notice a large, round, hairy...thing placed in front of each foot, courtesy of a pair of Zipplebacks... Without any warning, Snotlout roared as he slipped, falling backwards onto his dragon, the pair being sent tumbling head-over-tail backwards, landing in the ocean with a resounding SPLASH!

Hookfang, for his part, wasn't bothered. Snotlout raced out of the drink and into the trees... I guess Hookang was used to the water from bathing. Come to think of it, wasn't he running from them at first?

Okay, crisis averted. I am not talking to Snotlout until he no longer breathes hazards to my health and sanity. Turning him back to normal was only going to solve the fire problem… his breath was another matter entirely.

A loud roar indicated that Snotlout was still in trouble, however... I could recognize a Nadder's roar from anywhere. And that didn't sound like Stormfly.

I quickly dashed further away from the soggy Nightmare, not interested in staying any longer.

My gaze turned behind me, hoping something steaming wasn't coming right after me. Instead, I found myself colliding with SOMETHING knobby and firm.

...ok, OW.

I fell to the ground, clutching at my nose for a painful moment to realize that I had bumped into a very green looking Gronckle.

Fishlegs turned towards me, his tongue slobbering all over the ground like he was some sort of overgrown dog. He at least seemed like he still considered me a friend.

I raised a hand. "Uh… hey!"

Fishlegs licked my hand and then proceeded to slobber all over me.

"Ugh… gross!" Still not as bad as Astrid or Toothless. What was it with all of my friends being obsessive about licking me? I get that they liked me… but, ugh, the idea that I am covered in slobber from my girlfriend and one of my closest friends did not sit well with me. Okay, I know, Toothless's slime doesn't bother me nearly as much, but he's been a dragon all of his life… as far as I know! This is different!

...that's a worrying thought, actually. What if Toothless was a victim of this stuff as well?  
I'll think about it later...

The Gronckle's ear twitched. He stopped licking me, his head rising as if to look at something.

"Something the matter?" I asked him.

Then the Gronckle trampled me on his way to...something.

I want to say I recovered but… Ow, let's just say I did….

I rose from the ground one more time and saw Fishlegs with Meatlug. "Uh… stay away from each other!" I really did not want to have to explain to Fishlegs parents about any incidents. I know it's not Winter or even Autumn, but, no, I am NOT taking any chances!

Fishlegs tried to rub his shoulder against his dragon, showering his affections for her similar to how he always did it… but I think he had different motivations than before.

To my surprise, Meatlug actually backed away, seeming a little insecure.

Fishlegs tried to advance, to jump ontop of her, but the other Gronckle was quickly moving away from her former rider, almost like she was avoiding him. She moved and darted into brush, behind rocks, the former teen following her every step.

… was she playing hard to get or maybe she really didn't like this change? I guess Fishlegs always thought of her like his child or something, maybe she thought of him the same way - as a father or something? Or maybe he was _her_ child? Jumping to "lover" might've been a bit much for ol' Lug.

Well, whatever the reason, it helped me make sure I was not going to end up having to explain to his parents over the grandkid issue…

Fishlegs continued to chase Meatlug, seemingly an endless cycle. Every now and again, the natural born Gronckle would keep looking to me with a pleading look.

I sighed. Looks like I was going to have to get involved.

I ran up to the chase as it happened, the pair separated by a large stone. Meatlug was hiding behind the rock once again, Fishlegs was trying to flush her out.

I considered intervening, but before I could act I found myself lifted off the ground by two heads. Looking back, I saw one of the Zipplebacks had picked me up by the arms, mischief gleaming in their eyes...

Without any warning, I was off the ground, and it was getting further and further away... oh gods. Ohhhhh gods oh gods oh gods. This was definitely NOT how I wanted to spend my day...

 **End: This just goes to show you, having your friends turn into dragons is only cool if they remain sane to appreciate it. Oh and they aren't the twins or related to the twins.**

 **Ket: Ain't that the truth... *grumbles* Haven't found a way to make the fruit NOT do that yet…**

 **End: Well, how did they get a coconut? Isn't it too far north for that?**

 **Ket: They were on a beach. Coconuts grow on the beach. That is all.  
...Also, Rule of Funny. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have experiments to get back to.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: Dream Works and Cressida Cowell own the How to Train Your Dragon franchise.**

"GYAAAAAAH!" I was screaming quite loudly as a Zippleback took me skywards.

Oh Tyr, please protect me! The twins - or their dragon - were out to kill me!

I flailed and tried to struggle free...then I realized that as they kept pulling me ever skyward, well, I probably should stop. I grabbed hold of the Zippleback's feet, hoping uh….they wouldn't be letting go of me any time soon.

"Toothless! Anyone!" I screamed.

The Zippleback - the Twins or their dragon, probably the Twins - just kept ascend aing - looked down at me, both heads grinning with an almost malicious intent. Okay Barf and Belch don't scare me as much as these two did just now, it's GOT to be Ruff and Tuff!

We kept climbing higher and higher, passing a low flying cloud.

We kept rising higher and higher and HIGHER...  
...Mother.

The clouds above seemed closer than the ground below and I was sure I was going to end up a Hiccup-cake if the twins let go of me. "Okay, uh, was this about the last time I stopped you two? You set fire to a house!"

I was ignored. Oh, why can't my friends understand me? Okay, maybe they don't WANT to right now... well, in Ruff and Tuff's case, they ASSUREDLY want to ignore me. It'd ruin their prank if they listened to me!

Assuming this was a prank… "Ha, ha, very funny guys!" I tried to laugh. "Now… put me-" I don't know if they understood me or not, but at that very instant they let go. "DOWN!" I yelled in panic.

Everything went blank for a moment as I closed my eyes, afraid to seem myself fall. But then I felt something grab onto me. I opened my eyes. Wait, where did Barf and Belch come from? Well, they caught me at least. Thank you Tyr…

And that was when I was knocked out of the Zippleback's grip, send tumbling again.

The twins hit their dragon suddenly, knocking me from their grasp and sending me into free fall again. I screamed, eyes closed, the sounds of dragons locked in combat above me. They filled the air above with poisonous gas, a cloud that was so think it blocked the sun. Then everything exploded and it wasn't my fault!

I was sent hurtling faster, burning embers falling around me.

And then a Zippleback burst from the flames. Barf and Belch flew after me, this time having me land on top of them.

Ugh, I felt that impact, but at least I wasn't a bloodsplatter. I turned my gaze towards my saviors, wondering what they were going to do to me now. I hung on tight, as we descended.

But I didn't celebrate for long. I heard a loud pair of shrieks from behind. I turned and found the twins, both heads seemingly annoyed.

Barf and Belch simply turned their heads back… and were they taunting them? They sounded like they were laughing. Oh Odin, I think I might have just become part of some game.

The twins dove and snatched me, keeping me in their palm.

Another interception by Barf knocked me out of one claw and into Belch's.

A gust of gas blasted in my direction and I had a split second's recollection before the explosion flung me from one dragon into another.

I got knocked again, again, and again. Trading from paws, wings, even tails I like was I some sort of ball. I couldn't tell who was what anymore and as far as I was concerned… I didn't care because they were both… four of them… were nothing but trouble . I screamed all throughout, wishing that they would just put me down.

The dragons kept fighting for control of me, like I was a favorite toy, their speed and violence increasing as they fought. Their heads all thrashed against each other, paws clashing, wings beating I was at the center, their object of desire. I can't say I haven't done this before! And then, that's when I noticed the fighting stopped.

That jarred me back into paying attention. The dragon heads above me looked rather startled, still… and completely in a tangle. Their heads were tied up and they couldn't break free. At the same time, their wings and limbs were also locked behind each other… It was like a cage… made of Zipplebacks. But if the Ruff, Tuff, Barf, and Belch were all tied together, all their limbs unmoving. "Uh... " Not good.

And then as if as the fact that I noticed it reminded the world that things not in flight should fall, we all plummeted downward. This time, I wasn't alone screaming to the top of my lungs. That was a bright side, right?

SPLASH!

My eyes stung, making it hard to open. I couldn't breathe either, water filling my lungs. I don't know how long it took for me to became aware of it, but I was underwater off the edge of the beach..

The instant I realized it I scrambled up to above the waves, then to the end of the beach. I felt nauseous... and was reminded of some bad memories from my childhood...

I opened my eyes, the water stinging, but I could see clearly and make out the shapes of the tangled-together Zipplebacks. They all looked at each other with almost bored expressions, unworried. Right, dragons could hold their breath.

And I couldn't. I quickly decided to struggle free and swim my way upward. They didn't stop me as I slipped out between their necks.

I burst out of the water, gasping for breath. And then spitting up water. "GAK... I can't hold my breath like you lot!" I swear, my dragon must be laughing his keister off at me right now...

And just as if on cue, on the shore, I saw Toothless chortling water out of his mouth as though he was drinking while he was away.

"You are no help at all," I told my dragon.

Toothless sat down, giving me that "cute" look he did when he knew he was in trouble.

I raised a finger and shook it. "Don't think I'm not on to you and your tricks." I crawled onto the short, water dripping off of everything I wore.

He just nosed the fruit closer to me... "...Toothless, NO." I was NOT eating that thing...no way, no how. SOMEONE had to control these crazy...why were my friends all coming out of the woods?

I don't know what came over them, but my friends, all of them came running out - except Snotlout, who was more crawling behind Astrid.

They jumped, wings extended and splashed into the waters, forming a massive splash that reached me even as far away I was.

...again, except Snotlout, who only did so after..."encouragement" from Astrid. In the form of aggressive growling and Hookfang. Yes, I can't believe it either, Hookfang nudged his former rider into the water.

The Nightmare whimpered as he did so.

The Zippleback duos emerged from the depths, rising from the waters like some four headed seadragon.

Were they all having… enjoying themselves? Well, not Snotlout, that was for sure - he looked like he wanted to run any moment, only staying because of a particular Nadder's aggressive "encouragement".

Toothless turned to me, his tail wagging with excitement. He was interested in playing in the ocean, clearly. Like I was gonna stand in his way.

I raised my hands and shook my head. "No. Go ahead!"

...so he proceeded to dive atop of me. Bloody typical. Was Toothless actively working against me. His teeth grabbed me by the scruff of my tunic and dragged me into the water.

...I just remembered why I didn't go swimming with my dragon.

Struggling, I tugged and pulled away from Toothless's maw, trying to get free so I could get sweet, precious AIR!

Toothless, sensing my distress (clearly), surfaced, allowing me to breathe "Toothless... do that again, and you are on LIMPETS for a week!"

He whimpered, ears falling some - good, he got the picture. I hated using the Limpet Threat, but... seriously, he was DROWNING me!

Looking to my friends, I saw that they were romping and swimming about, except for the Nightmares. Hookfang was just floating on the waves, eyes clos-napping again, I see-while Snotlout was doing his best to stay as dry as possible; it's kinda strange for Snotlout to be so… timid.

Which of course meant the Zipplebacks worked to splash him the most.

Toothless joined the others, splashing right into Astrid and Stormfly. Both Nadders shrieked by the sudden addition of the male Night Fury. They dove underwater, Toothless in hot pursuit.

For a moment, everything was quiet, but I could practically feel something happening beneath the waves. I'd look for myself, but I didn't want to risk drowning.

But just then I found myself rising out of the waters, Toothless's head right under my feet!  
…That was not a good sign.

Astrid burst from the water, taking me down yet again. I fell into the water again, but this time I was able to free myself and rise to the surface… only to get pulled down by another force, this time my dragon. Oh, not again!

I was pulled and tugged in every direction, wondering if I would drown here. The waves battered against me, water entering my mouth in desperate gasps.

I don't know how, but by some miracle perhaps given to me by Odin himself, I ended up on the beach, tired and exhausted. I choked something out and laid on my back. The sun was setting at this point, the sky turning bright red. Toothless and Astrid were every bit as bad as the Zipplebacks. I swear, I am never going to let this go. Astrid obviously did what she did because well, she liked me a little too much. As for Toothless, I'm betting this is his way of encouraging me to take a bite out of that cursed fruit.

Toothless approached me, a satisfied smirk on of his draconic face.

"... You are… so lucky… I like you..." I told him, patting his head.

Toothless let out a gentle rumble from his throat, contented.

"...You're still on Limpets." He whimpered.

I rose my head from the muddy sands and looked at the rest of my friend as they continued to play with each other in the waters. If I squinted hard enough, I could pretend that everyone was actually back to normal, but I knew they weren't… no matter how much I wanted to pretend.

They were all so wild, untamed, as though they were dragons in of themselves. They acted… somewhat like themselves. Astrid still liked me, Snotlout wanted Astrid, Fishlegs liked Meatlug… and the twins were the twins. But they were all… more chaotic, less restrained. Their dragons were all well behaved, disciplined, making my friends, the former humans seem like they were more dragonlike than their dragons.

I sighed.

I couldn't control them, not when it's just one of me against four-five of them. Their dragons weren't helping me, Toothless was actively against me. How was I supposed to control them?

And then it hit me: By taming them… like they were actually dragons.

I blinked for a second, thinking on it more. I wonder if this was going to have an effect on them when they turned back… if they turned back, but I don't think I should dwell on that too much. Ugh… I just hope that if I ever brought this up, if I say I "tamed" my girlfriend, people don't look at us like we caught the plague.

I saw Toothless looking at me skeptically, as if he probably knew what was going through my head. "Okay, so… are you going to finally help me or what?"

He cocked his head, gave me that goofy grin, and ran to join the others.  
Oh. Of course. He'd rather me join in.

...This was just greaaaaaaaaat.

 **Ket: Is it just me, or does Toothless REALLY want Hiccup to be a dragon?**

 **End: Hey, everyone else is doing it!**

 **Ket: He'd probably like to keep his mind though...at least right now. *heehee***

 **End: Hiccup has more important things to worry about… like how's he supposed to capture his friends?**

 **Ket: Exac-wait, CAPTURE? Ooooh, he better HOPE they don't remember when this is reversed..can it be reversed?**

 **End: No spoilers.**

 **Ket: ...right. Well, I know anyways. But only we do, not anyone else, and that's what's important.**


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer: Dream Works and Cressida Cowell own the How to Train Your Dragon franchise.**

ROAAAARRRRRRRRRR!

...I think I made them angry.

I looked over to a blazing Snotlout, belching fire right up in front of my face and wondered if maybe I went a _wee bit_ too far.

Okay, so I bet you're wondering what I just did to get a Monstrous Nightmare THAT peeved at me.

Well… you see… I caged him and the others, locking them in nice reinforced bamboo tied together with flameproof cloth.

You're probably wondering how I made it. Well, truth is… I don't know either. I mean, it's been _hours_ since I last saw you guy and I know I'm getting to that point where I'm probably hallucinating things; I mean what Viking hasn't heard of bamboo! I mean, I think I could have made a cage like in a few hours… right?

The twins belched out poisonous fumes… which as soon as the Nightmare lit a flame. The explosion covered everyone involved in burning soot. And as fireproof dragons were, they clearly didn't like unintended blazes.

About the only one there who wasn't miffed was Fishlegs. He pawed at the cage hoping to get in contact with Meatlug. Sadly for him, the "real" dragons weren't anywhere in sight. Not even my dragon was here. No, they're not lost; I had my dragon distract them.

...But wait, where was Astrid?

ROARRRRRRR!"

...and that sounded like a Deadly Nadder.

Time to run. I had to get to her, soon as possible. I couldn't leave Astrid out and about where she might get herself hurt.

Especially since it sounded like she was closing in, her cries getting louder with each. Where was she... Oh, right.

I quickly found myself getting hurled into the ground, face first at high speeds before getting hit by a barrage of… licks. My spine felt like it was going to crack under my girlfriend's tremendous weight…. Don't tell Astrid that...

I spat out some sand and briefly wondered to myself if this would all be worth , no matter what form you have, you always knew how to show your affections while making me hurt all over… well, it was easier when she wasn't a dozen times her normal weight and covered in scales. "Uh… Astrid…"

My girlfriend let out a pleased cry.

I rolled onto my backside and she then started showing her affections even more directly. Ugh… wasn't it boys that were supposed to be more gross?

Most boys?

...then again, we ARE Vikings.

...And Stormfly's a dragon. That just butted her Rider off of me.

"THANK YOU!" I yelled at her before tearing off.

I climbed up a tree, my girlfriend in hot pursuit. She flapped her wings and was suddenly in the branches above me… which was planned. Sorry Astird. See… there's a downside to being so heavy… The branches snapped under her weight causing her to plummet after a few seconds of overestimation. I quickly swung down and avoided her before that happened.

...She'd be ok, at least... right?

I looked over her fallen form... which began moving.

Time to go. Again.

I ran into the bushes and tried to keep myself low to the ground, not even moving a muscle. Hiding was my only option right now, since my girlfriend even on the best of days pretty much out classed me in every field before. I had to get the drop on Astrid, if I wanted to "tame" her. Gah, Odin, that sounded so horrible.

Either way, Astrid wasn't exactly using all of her brain right now… I'm just digging myself into an early grave aren't I?

Astrid's snot began probing for me, sniffing out everything. Her senses would be so much sharper than that of a normal person and I knew that it was only a matter of time before she caught me.

I quickly tossed a rock several feet over. She picked up the noise quickly and dashed over to the source. She then sniffed the air and the ground, looking for more signs of me.

Another rock sent her flying astray even farther.

Astrid was so easy to fool like this. Oh, I hope she doesn't see this later on and decide I get a bashing.

With my girlfriend distracted as she was, I knew it was time for me to make my move. I dashed quickly towards Astrid, the Nadder surprised at my appearance from an entirely different area. She was about to tackle me again, but this time I went over to her.

I climbed onto her back in a quick motion. She cocked her head to the side to give me a quick look. But this is precisely what I wanted her to do. See, my girlfriend was a dragon right? That meant… she had a dragon's weaknesses.

...please don't kill me for this later Astrid.

I gently stroked her head and rubbed on her chin, pinching a very specific point. She slowly eased into the ground after that, her eyes going lazy and her tongue out of her mouth. I had her at my mercy.

I gave a sigh of relief, knowing that the worst of it was over. "You… are so troublesome, you know that?"

Astrid gave a lazy purr. Yeah, she was barely conscious at this point, her draconic mind pretty much swimming in pleasure and bliss right now. Oh, Thor, why couldn't this be every other day of my life? But she was going to shake it off soon, and well, repeatedly using that trick so soon didn't work out so well.

"Now, are you going to be more of a problem?"

She promptly tackled and licked me again.

"Arrrgh... geroff!" I scratched under her chin again, causing her to go lazy yet again - atop of me. "Brilliant! Just brilliant..."

I kept shouting loud, hoping that Stormfly would save me... again...

...she wasn't coming was she?

Great... I was in trouble wasn't I...

I really wish I was a little...beefier, stronger. Maybe after this, I'll start go into some body building routine… because I can't be expected to ask Astrid to be easier to carry. "You know, I wish you were… smaller. Maybe something other than a ton heavy Nadder."

Astrid's eyes flicker slowly open, her vision must be getting better. Using whatever strength I had in my, I lifted my girlfriend's head off of me and slipped out. Ah… sweet relief!

Astrid turned to me, crooning. "I'm sorry...yer just a wee bit too heavy for me..."

The dragoness simply let out a whine. Maybe she was starting to pick up on Norse, again. Which was hopefully true because if I was forced into keeping her like… all of this for only Odin knows how long, it'd certainly make things easier.

The Nadder went straight to cleaning herself, touching her slimy tongue against every other part of her body. I winced in disgust. Oh, this was so gross.

Alright...so...should I get her back in the cage, or not? She was… calm right now. Maybe I could let her stay out… but then again, how was I to make sure she wasn't going to fly off as soon as I take my eyes off her? It's not like I can…

Astrid's groans of discomfort called me back to Midgard. Looking her way, I saw that she'd managed to get herself caught in a nearby tree. Great... Just great...

I groaned, walking over to help get her out. She was stuck in a tight net of branches... or, more specifically, her spines were. She couldn't go forwards, either, due to there being a large boulder in the way.

I sighed, and carefully moved the branches, being careful not to prick myself. It wasn't easy...one wrong move, and I'd need antivenom. Which we didn't have.

Thankfully I was able to free her safely... and was rewarded with a pounce and a flurry of licks. "...you're welcome..."

I had to get her off of me... but...how?

I suddenly remembered I had some dragon Nip in my pocket, in case of emergency dragon encounter... this probably qualified.

Reaching in, I pulled out the grass, hoping I wouldn't die later for this...

Astrid suddenly rolled off of me, tongue lolling as she panted.

Once we were both on the ground again, I realized how dizzy I was starting to get. I hadn't slept and I was sure that I was _way_ past my bedtime by now. I sat against Astrid's back and looked her in the eyes. "You tired, girl?" It felt so strange to ask Astrid that… but well, maybe she wouldn't mind.

The dragon's nose rubbed against my sides and I knew she wanted to stay by my side.

Yeah, maybe all I have to do is stay near her. I mean, we what was the worst that could happen?

I lay my head against her side. "Alright, just promise to behave and I'll sleep by you."

The thought seemed to excite the Nadder. She licked my face. Yuk… well, not as bad as before at any rate.

I patted my girlfriend on the head one last time and did not have to try hard to close my eyes. Astrid's loud heartbeats pounded against my head, like Toothless's pulsing, but a bit faster…

I then found myself awaking to the taste of sand in my mouth and a dull aching in my skull. I slowly rose off my feet, groaning with sandy eyes. "Ugh… what happened?" The sand was warmer now, the light around me practically blinding. It had to have been day… My eyelids slowly opened and I saw wait… "Astrid…?" It couldn't be… could it?

My girlfriend bend down at me, an embarrassed look on her face. She helped me to my feet, taking one of my hands in hers. "Uh, sorry about that Hiccup, but… uh, you startled me."

Startled her? And… wait she was talking Norse, wasn't she? I blinked and realize that Astrid… wasn't a Nadder anymore. I sized her up, looking at her from toes to head. "Uh...uh…" I tried to struggle for the words. "... You're wearing clothes…" Did… did she change?

Astrid just slightly punched by in the shoulders, letting out a nervous laugh. "What's gotten into you? I mean… I know we're… you know, but… I'm not doing anything that my Dad isn't going to find … too weird."

I blinked. Why was she so… carefree. Doesn't she recall about what happened last night "You… don't remember night?"

She snorted. "Only that we ended up here after eating that dragonfruit..."

This was troubling. "You mean… you don't remember turning into a Nadder or…uh?"

Astrid looked at me like I had gone crazy. Well, crazier. She didn't need to speak to me about it, not when the look she gave me said everything.

I tried to take that all in. She didn't… remember turning into a Nadder. Maybe she was right and I had probably hallucinated the whole thing. I mean, the twins probably took my jacket and caused chaos, but that's normal!

I tried to smile. "Oh, I think I had the wildest dream…"

She nodded and helped my brush the sand out of my hair. "Good," she surveyed the camp site. "Wait, where are the others?"

Realization struck and I recalled there was something I had to do. "... wait one moment…" I then quickly dashed off to the cage I set for my friends, finding the others all railing against the bars with whatever they could.

"Hey, Hiccup is this some kind of joke?" asked Snotlout.

"Yeah. I'm not a caged animal!" said Tuff.

"Says you…" replied his sister, Ruff.

"Hey!" complained the brother.

"Uh… Hiccup…. Please…" Fishlegs winced, clearly not wanting to be in the same cage as the others.

I gave them all an awkward smile. So, I did actually cage my friends. Did I actually hallucinate all of that and cage them? "I'll… get you guys out," I promised. Yeah, this morning was going to be the most awkward one ever.

As I stepped forward my feet brushed against some discarded clothing, specifically Snotlout's jacket. As much as I did not like touching Snotlout's stuff, I picked it up and did a quick examination. It was burned and torn, as if the one wearing it just… burst out of it. I quickly turned my eyes towards Snotlout who looked at me very impatiently. He was wearing his usual jacket… exactly the same as the one I had in my hands right now.

"What are you waiting for…?" he asked. "Get us out!" Maybe demanded is more appropriate, but I don't think I was paying attention.

I struggled to wrap my mind around the puzzle, I mean. I could have sworn Snotlout destroyed his own clothing yesterday and now here he was wearing an exact copy of it. And well, how was he supposed to have changed out of it while in the cage?

I approached the cage in defeat. This was going to need quite a lot of explaining. "You're going to think I've gone crazy….er."

 **Ket: ...pity they reverted after such a short amount of time, isn't it?**

 **End: Yeah, but it's not like we could have kept this story going for 50 chapters.**

 **Ket: Fair point... how'd they revert though? And why do they still have their clothes?**

 **End: … I'd say, but I think Hiccup's brain is melting trying to figure that out right now...**


	5. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer: Dream Works and Cressida Cowell own the How to Train Your Dragon franchise.**

...You know, after the whole affair with the Red Death, I thought everyone was done with the "making fun of Hiccup" thing. Except Mildew. And some from the other tribes (like, y'know, Dagur). It was like everyone thought I had gone crazy. Okay, maybe they had a point, but… I'm not really sure it's possible to come off as anything but weird…

"Come on, Astrid!"

"Hiccup..."

"I swear, I'm telling the truth!"

"...You're only making your case worse."

I picked up and held the only remaining piece of dragon fruit on my hands and shook it around. "I'm telling you, these turned you all into dragons!"

"Uh-huh…." Astrid bemoaned, looking at me cross. "And you also said that we busted out of our clothes and tore them to shreds…" I took up one of the rags that made up Astrid's shirk all torn.

She just rolled her eyes, dismissive. "Just because it looks like it's mine doesn't mean it is…"

"And I showed you the shredded clothes! Snotlout, yours were even burnt!"

Snotlout shrugged, uncaring about it between gulps of fresh meat. He was more interested in breakfast.

I sighed... would ANY of them believe me?

"We believe you!" Said Tuffnut, his grin so big I bet my dad could see it.

"Yeah, we REALLY believe you...' Ruff said, confirming the sarcasm.

"Thank you for having your faith in me," I bitterly said. Yeah, definitely "everyone make fun of Hiccup day" again. Have they been waiting for this?

The twins bumped their fists together, exchanging wily grins. Sometimes I really have to wonder if I could do better. I mean, the twins still owe me a new satchel.

I sighed and turned to the only other person I thought who would have my back… now if only he would stop chasing his dragon.

"Come here girl! Come here!" Cried Fishlegs as he attempted chase after his dragon.

Meatlug went behind a rock. In a manner that reminded me of yesterday's shenanigans Fishlegs went after her, duplicating his movements almost step by step. Meatlug however did not seem to like being anywhere near her owner, not after yesterday.

"Aw, what's wrong?" Fishlegs cried out. "Does my breath stink?" He then blew into a hand and took a deep sniff. His expression turned sour and he wiped his palms against the dirt.

"She's still probably making sure you aren't going to, well…" I put my fingers together and twiddled my thumbs. How was I supposed to explain this anyways?

Fishlegs looked at me skeptically. "Hiccup, if it's about people turning into dragons; I'll have you know it's logically impossible!"

"But you were a Gronckle and well…" I winced. Oh perfect timing to have a small nervous breakdown over topics like this.

"Well if that did happen," Fishlegs took out his notebook. "I'd have to at least grow many times my size to be even a Gronckle."

"Which you did," I pointed out.

"Yes. But eating a single fruit wouldn't give me the necessary…." He struggled to find the word. "Bulk to get so large. Second is of course turning into a dragon would require massive amounts of physical changes done in a short amount of time. I mean, I'd have to grow scales and all. And that's impossible."

"Loki did that a lot!" I pointed out. I mean, seriously, we both knew about Odin's brother's shapeshifter tendencies. I mean, he turned into a horse.

"Loki is a god," said Fishlegs. "A fruit doesn't have that kind of power."

"Fruits are what make gods immortal in the first place!"

Fishlegs opened his mouth and then closed it for a dead moment. "... Those don't count." To you. "Besides, wouldn't we remember it?"

"I don't know you know don't!" I kept saying. Seriously, I think I hate magic fruit... gets me all tongue-tied

But with no one to side with me, I was left with a very untrustworthy reptile. "Toothless?"

My dragon just let out a snigger. Great, he wasn't having my back either.

I turned to the other dragons other than Meatlug. Now I was desperate. "What about you guys?"

Stormfly grunted something, not exactly sounding fond of pleased to be asked that. She probably didn't want to recall last night, probably because she had issues getting along with her rider.

Barf and Belch weren't a help either. Mostly because, like their riders, they believed in making my life as annoying as possible.

Hookfang did not speak up, mostly because Snotlout, now having completely eaten through his plate was trying to get Hookfang to roll onto his side in another attempt to get Astrid's attention. He was failing at it, but don't tell him I said that. Hookfang did his best to not move, as if the difference between his "master" being a dragon or not wasn't important enough to make note of.

Yeah, I am looking like an idiot after this.

"Are you done yet?" complained Astrid.

"...Done with what?" I countered.

"...All this 'We turned into dragons' stuff, duh!" Snotlout answered for Astrid.

She groaned. "Yeah...that."

...Honestly, if I knew how they reverted, I'd take a bite of the fruit then and there to prove my point. As it was, I wanted to show up back home with SOME semblance to sanity. Now I was sure they were going to think I ended up getting food poisoned and hallucinated. "But… you don't remember last night at all..."

"...Y'sure? I don't think much time's passed..." 'Lout griped. And was promptly slapped by Astrid.

"Uh, well, I don't think we brought any mead," said Fishlegs. "I think I remember eating the fruit... last."

I perked up. Maybe they'd start believing me now?

Astrid squinted her eyes. "Hm… I do too."

Yes. Yes. I am not going crazy.

"Maybe they made us all have a hangover," said Snotlout.

And then my hopes were put into jeopardy. "Wait,"

"That's… a good point," admitted Fishlegs. He did a quick double take. "Well…"

"...Wouldn't a hangover leave you with worse than memory loss?" Tuffnut asked.

"Not like we know from experience or anything..." Said Ruffnut evasively.

That earned them some looks.

"Guys… I remember last night…"

"Or you remember getting drunk. Didn't you eat a fruit like we did?" Astrid asked.

"Uh, no," I answered. "Toothless wanted some attention first so I didn't."

"Or maybe you don't remember it because you were hallucinating like the rest of us… " Fishlegs suggested. "I mean, really, turning into dragons just ridiculous don't you think?"

"... But the clothes and the cage?" I felt beads of sweat trickle down my back. I needed to get more proof. "The twins stole my things and…"

"And that's unusual how?" Astrid raised an eyebrow.

I cringed. She was right. The twins did that stuff constantly; I needed something else. "You were … flirting with me."

Astrid's face turned red. "Hiccup!" She cried.

I earned a slap for it. Everyone laughed, though they became rather nervous about it after Astrid turned looks to them. Not that it fully stopped the sniggers.

Well, she did try to flirt with me. Even gave me her "food" like always. Though I probably shouldn't mention a comparison of THAT either way. On the other hand… maybe I was imagining everyone turning into dragons. It was pretty impossible right?

...yeah, it had to be, I'm sure of it...yep, pretty freaking sure...best we put this behind us."Let...Let's just head back, alright? And never mention this again...please?"

A chorus of reluctant affirmation was the only reply I received.

The trip home was mercifully silent. I didn't talk with anyone, working to instead working out how to suppress those assuredly fake memories. The others just chattered amongst themselves, ignoring me - thankfully.

I gave a maddened laugh. My friends turning into dragons. How rich?

I mean, how else would I explain my friends turning out the same kind of creatures as their own dragons? It was too much of a coincidence and unreal.

I still probably needed to get back at Toothless for not having my back, even if it was a hallucination. Maybe I could give threaten to give him eels or tease him with dragon nip-

"FIRE!" I broke my train of though just in time to hear Fishlegs shouting, directing our attention towards the...village…

HOLY ODIN WHAT HAPPENED? There were clouds of smoke rising from where Berk was. Was there an attack while we were away? Alvin? Dagur again?

True to form, Astrid raced on ahead, Stormfly beating her wings rapidly to accelerate her Rider to the village. Not to be left behind, I followed her.

With the fastest dragon in the air, I rode forth, kicking Toothless into the fastest he could. I readied and steeled myself to meet an enemy force.

...Dragons. Dragons EVERYWHERE. Far more than we had in the stables or the Ring, and many I hadn't seen before and that's counting all of the raids or in the dragon's old nesting grounds. Were we being attacked by a Red Death or something?

They didn't bother me for some reason. Toothless swooped down so I could get a better look at... ye gods, what happened to my house? To the Ring?  
...to Dad?  
...wait why was this Thunderdrum approaching me.

I had Toothless bolt to the ground. I didn't want to fight. We jetted into the nearest building that wasn't on fire and locked the door. The dragon rubbed its head against it, making thuds and noise as it did.

It whimpered and took off a minute later.

Once it was clear, I poked my head out and scanned the streets. Where was everyone?

Nearby was an empty barrel, holding only one...dragonfruit...

...it wasn't a dream, was it?

I turned to Toothless. "...You could've warned me, you stupid lizard."

He just grinned as I heard some people - thank Odin, _PEOPLE_ \- run inside my building. They were somewhere in the upstairs by the sound of things. I quickly rushed towards the top, climbing the nearest stairway I could find and found myself oddly disappointed. "Uh… hey guys!" I cackled nervously.

Upon their faces were bewildered looks. "Uh, where did all of the people go?" wondered Snotlout.

"And where'd all these dragons come from?" Fishlegs added.

I held up the fruit in my palms.

Astrid squinted her eyes, still skeptical. "You can't be serious!"

I felt myself grow a little more unhinged with every chuckle; now was I going to go mad if I was aware I was going mad? I don't know. "Everyone but me ate this!" Trader Johann must have had way too much of these to give away, enough to flood the whole town in dragons.

Even the twins looked at me like I was crazy. "You are insane," said Tuffnut.

"Yeah, what he said," agreed Ruffnut.

Yeah, definitely an odd day when the twins think I was off the deep end.

I found myself letting out more of a half-deranged (or maybe all-deranged, I couldn't be sure) laugh. "Well, what do you think happened to everyone?"

Not a word was said.

"See. I told you!" With that victory, I realized I was feeling a little peckish. I took a quick a bite to eat.

 **End: I guess the story's title is a bit inaccurate now...**

 **Ket: ...does he even realize what he just ate? *slides you some juice***

 **End: *pushes juice away* I'm fairly sure he's lost his sanity before eating it already.**

 **Ket: Well I hope he gets it back... well, when he reverts that is. *notices the juice* Awww, you didn't fall for it…**

 **End: I know your tricks.**


End file.
